So do I exist?

So I dont exist for a week and then suddenly you start to talk to me again...
Every time you have seen me in the past week you have talked to everyone except me. You looked at everyone but me. Maybe I cause you some pain I hope so cause it gives me pain to see you.

I think I would rather not exist for at least another week. Just to give me time to get over you.
I was close to it. Then you talked to me today. I wish you would make up your mind as to whether I exist in your eyes or not. I went through 8 years at primary school of being invisible its not actually as hard as people think it is. but the worst part is when people fluctuate between thinking you exist or not.

My exuberance and talkitiveness and hyperness was just so I could have an excuse to hide my proper feelings. If I had acted how i felt it would have been sullen and I wouldnt have talked to anyone. soooo...

But I can do it. I will get over you. I must get over you. You arent worth the pain, the sleepless nights, the not eating. If you cant bring yourself to face me then why should I care. So just get out of my life and my head for another week or two and maybe I will be able to face you as a friend again.